I'm mad as hell....

... and I'm not going to take it anymore!
Literally.

Metformin.
It and I are done. No more. I can't take it anymore. Figuratively and literally.

After my nurse told me to lay off for a week and then restart, I thought, "Alright, maybe this go around will be better."

So, I started taking the pills, again.
I got through the first week alright, again.
I upped the dosage, again.
I did ok until it was near time to up the dosage, again.
Five-ish days into taking two pills, my digestive everything exploded, AGAIN.

I am not pleased....... again.

Recommending

Today's recommendations are for:
Asian Horror movies:

Shutter - do watch, jumpy moments
Noroi - do watch, weird and entertaining
Reincarnation - do watch, sort of Asian remake of the Shining
Phone - do watch, good stuff
the Host - meh
Ring - do watch, classic creepy
Koma - do watch, love it
Audition - do watch, and cringe
Uzumaki - do watch, and be confused
Ju on - do watch
Ju on 2 - do watch
Ju rei - do watch
A tale of two sisters - do watch, a favorite!
Coming soon - meh
Someone behind you - do watch, why are all girls in horror movies so darn cute?
The Eye - do watch
The Eye II - not so much watch
Cello -do watch, watch out for those instruments

Birthing

The U.S. broke records in 2007. Not by greatest amounts of charity, not by huge steps taken toward removing greenhouse gases or by other Earth-helping/cool futuristic things.

No. The U.S. broke records in the amount of births that year.

Seriously. I'm rolling my eyes so hard, I'm sure you can feel it through the computer screen.

When I read the headline: "U.S. breaks records...," I was very , then I read the rest of the headline, "..births."

40 percent of these kids are born out of wedlock. Call me old-fashioned, but I like the know that these babies are being taken care of; you know: diapers, food, blankets, clothes. And, I like to know that babies have a mother and a father figure. Not only that, but in today's economy, single
parents can barely cut it.

Hell, I can barely feed myself.

This is just irresponsible. There are people... nay, whole countries starving and we're popping out babies like it's the next biggest diet fad.

And don't get me started on the OctoMom, that's just disgusting.

The whole OctoMom fiasco makes me want to vomit. From the top, down.
How could a doctor help a woman have eight kids... in addition to the six kids she already had, knowing that she can barely take care of them by way of money and care.... and, I don't know, proper mentality. Half of the first six are on disability for various disorders. And, while I don't wish it on them, I would be surprised if the eight were sick too.

Well, here's one thing that I get: the right of a person to have kids. As many kids as they want. That's fine, that's your right.

However, it's completely irresponsible to have a litter of kids and not be able to take care of them.

And this is not just directed toward the OctoMom, but also to people I see everyday. Ladies my age (even younger) with tons of kids, looking haggard, not able to take care of their kids. Barely able to take care of themselves....

That's it... I'm done with this. It's irresponsible. The end.

From sage to scholar

According to Merriam-Webster: schol·ar
Pronunciation:
\ˈskä-lər\
Function:
noun
Etymology:
Middle English scoler, from Old English scolere & Anglo-French escoler, from Medieval Latin scholaris, from Late Latin, of a school, from Latin schola school
Date:
before 12th century

1: a person who attends a school or studies under a teacher : pupil
2 a: a person who has done advanced study in a special field b: a learned person
3: a holder of a scholarship

While in university, I was always asked if I minded being in school for so long. Or sometimes it was a teasing, “What are you going to be? A lifetime student?” I usually answered that I was a scholar and loved learning.
Now, most of the people who asked didn’t attend college/university; they did ‘their time’ in high school and that was it.
I on the other hand, reveled in the fact that I was going to university.
And now, I’m going back for more.

After much debate and back and forth, I’ve decided that I’m going to graduate school. I’ve always been interested in teaching on the higher learning end and English was always a favorite subject (after art, of course ☺)
So, I will be getting my MATL: Masters in Art in Teaching Languages; my emphasis in TESOL: Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages.

I’m so excited!

There’s so much to do:
Take the GRE
Get three letters of recommendation (one down, two to go)
Get my transcripts sent over
Fill out the application
And write an essay about myself and my goals :P

Packing... sorta

Things I've recently watched and enjoyed: 

Doctor Who Christmas special 2008

Watchmen

There were only a few things that I was confused with them leaving out....

Such as the rape confrontation, I think that would have shown how much Laurie did know about her mother and the Comedian.

.... and the cuteness of the snow owl suit: it was nowhere as cute in the movie.

The Doctor Who special pulled at the heartstrings.... for more than one reason: there's only three more specials/episodes with David Tennant playing the Doctor. D:  ::shock and dismay::

Which also reminds me that I need to pick up Season 4. As it is my favorite to date. If I put them in order from most enjoyed, it would be 4, 2 and then a tie between 1 and 3. 

Still piddling about with moving things from one apartment to another.... really need to get a move on it. The parents are going to come down soon to move the heavier stuff: bed, bureau, TV.... *sigh* This moving business is poopy.....

Also, in strange and sad news, the executive editor at HA just got laid off...... while I can see the move as saving lots of money (because she's probably the highest or next-highest paid person there) it's still disconcerting and sad. And sudden...

Choking....

Nearly choked, today.
Alexander McQueen... in my Target?
Well... maybe not MY Target, but you know,... some Targets.

Check it out

Also, lack of good consignment shops sadden me.
However, great new tunes have been entertaining me past this.

C-c-combo breaker!

There.... it had to be done.
Can't have a blog full of illness/sickness talk. It get depressing.
So, on to more light matters:

Started moving things into the new apartment..... and by things... I mean a bottle of handsoap.

What?
That's all I had with me in the car.

Went over to measure the place, then use the measurements to figure out where everything is to be placed.... or so it's supposed to be placed. Trying to go about this in a more planned/thought out manner than the current apartment.
The plan for it was: shove the heavy stuff around, against walls and I'll fill in the rest. Didn't exactly work in the most aesthetic way.

The important stuff (books, video games and movies) is packed a ready to go. *sigh* But everything else has to be packed too. :(

The Purge

For those of you with weak stomachs, you may not want to read any further.
The following describes graphic pain and wastes of grossness.
Instead I give you this:




Still here?
Alright, for those of you that have a masochistic side, here we go!

Last night started out alright. I had supper, which was two burritos and some fruit and metformin (as it needs to be taken with food).
Then went to study.
When finished, I took the rest of my meds, has some rice, beans and chicken and went to stay at a friend's place, since my bathroom is currently on the fritz.

Around 3 a.m., I awoke with a sharp stabbing pain in my stomach again.
Great, I thought, more pain.
This, however, wouldn't be a reoccurrence of the other night; this would be different. This would be hours long.

In a violent rhapsody of wails, pleading and tears, everything that I had eaten that day was expelled in any and every way possible. For two and a half hours...

At one point, I was puking so hard, I nearly crapped my pants.
Seriously.

I finally got my doctor's nurse on the phone, and after a few back and forths, she suggested I stop for a week, then take one for a week and see how it goes from there...

I'm not exactly pleased with this...

Medication and me

Or, the mysterious case of the sick Rose...


According to Wikipedia, and bolded for importance: Metformin is the most popular anti-diabetic drug in the United States and one of the most prescribed drugs in the country overall, with nearly 35 million prescriptions filled in 2006 for generic metformin alone. It is also used in
the treatment of polycystic ovary syndrome.
When prescribed appropriately, metformin causes few adverse effects-the most
common is gastrointestinal upset-
The most common adverse effect of metformin is gastrointestinal upset, including diarrhea, cramps, nausea, vomiting and increased flatulence; metformin is more commonly associated with gastrointestinal side effects than most other anti-diabetic drugs.
Gastrointestinal upset can cause severe discomfort for patients; it is most common when metformin is first administered, or when the dose is increased. The discomfort can often be avoided by beginning at a low dose (1 to 1.7 grams per day) and increasing the dose gradually. Gastrointestinal upset after prolonged, steady use is less common.

Lies!

I expected and received the common side effects, making me incredibly attractive to be around. :P

However, I didn't expect the severe gastro-whosy-whats-it.

I had been getting long periods of nausea, and had already called my doctor about this; whom hasn't returned my call.. >:(

Sunday, I went to work feeling a bit nauseous, as had become the usual every few days or so. Didn't pay it too much mind throughout the day.
It stuck with me after I got off work and made pasta for supper and the nausea seemed to calm down a bit.
Until, a little after 9 p.m., the nausea was accompanied by pain.
Thinking that it would soon pass, I sat back and tried to relax as much as possible. The pain began to come in waves; so I took deep breaths, as this always works to make me feel better.

Yet, every second that ticked by, the pain got worse and worse.
I tried to focus on the MMO I was playing, to distract myself.
Yet, the pain kept coming on. It got to where I couldn't speak.

I hadn't felt this kind of pain in years and was terrified. I was thinking that my old pains were back! I had to get to the ER.
My ability to even stand was gone.

I was crawling around, gathering up my medications (which is something you should bring with you when visiting a doctor of any sort) and realized: if I can't walk... there's no way I'm going to be able to drive!

To stave off ambulance fees, I called a friend to act as driver.
Yet, instead of taking me to the ER, he took me back to his and forced me to lay down and take my meds.

When the pain had lessened and I was a bit more coherent, he reminded me that since stomach pains are such a nebulous symptom, chances are that the nurse/doctor would just give me some medication to sleep it off.
And that's what I did.

I have yet to find out what it is that's making the medicine mess with me.

I've heard two accounts of others taking the medicine: no problems with one and just nausea with the other.

If pain like that is anything like having birth/contractions, you can take that to someone else! I'll have none of that!

Is this how it's going to be?

It's the pills really....
When my endo doctor told me that I would finally be able to lose weight.... and that all I would have to do is take my meds and follow his advice, I thought, "piece of cake."

Well.... it's a piece of painful cake. Painful, nauseous, exhausted cake.
My new medication listed side effects such as stomach upset, nausea and gas.

How attractive. :/

However, I took this in stride; expecting the first week to be a bit worrisome and for it to stave off as the weeks go by.
This medication is extremely strong, so the doctor prescribed that I take one daily for a week, two daily for a week and finally three daily after that.

The first week went by with no problems. In fact, the meds make me sleepy and coupled with the other meds that also make me sleepy, I wasn't having trouble getting to sleep..... well, more like I would fall into a sort of catatonic state which leads to sleep, but the end result is sleep and that's what matters.

The gas started up at the end of the first week/beginning of the second week. However, I didn't have any meeting this week, so it was quite easy to slip off to the ladies room/outside for less embarrassment.

Two days before I was to begin taking three daily, I woke up completely nauseous. I assumed I was hungry, as I can get sick from going too long without eating. Yet, the act of getting out of bed was a trial. I almost called in sick. For the rest of the day, I was batting back and forth between stomach being pissy and keeping myself close to the ladies room incase my breakfast of lukewarm Cream of Wheat was rejected.
What meals I choked down that day were gooey and soft: Cream of Wheat..... I don't even remember anything else....
I went to sleep hoping that my stomach would be kind the following day.
The next day, I was on the cusp of nausea, yet was able to eat more solid food. I was pretty worried at this point, so I called my endo nurse, who said she would get in contact with the doctor (as he was out that day) and let me know what I was to do....

This was Tuesday. I haven't heard anything back from them.

I was going to study for my Praxis yesterday, since the test is Friday and all, but was too nauseaous to want to leave the couch/bed.

I haven't started taking three daily because I'm afraid I won't be able to eat at all.
This wasn't the way I expected to lose weight. O.o;;


P.S. The pills above are not my current pills. If I remember correctly, they're just a high amount of naproxen that I used to take. This is a photograph from my photography portfolio that was supposed to incite emotions and give a glimpse into states of mind.
The state of mind I was in while taking this photograph was that I thought I took too many pills. Hah, I could laugh at that amount compared to now.